Saturday, December 22, 2007

What a week

It's so amazing to me what God can do in my life in a weeks time. He has spoken in several different ways that I won't go into, but I am encouraged.
I know that there are things that need A LOT of attention and things that need changed in my life, but there are also things that God is using. I am always stunned when that happens.

I had opportunities this week that I am sure God used to teach me a few things about myself. Even if we are totally human, and make mistakes, if we make ourselves available to be used by Him, He will actually use us. I have been very blessed to be a part of a support group that our church holds for those in grief. It is called GriefShare. Jeff and I have been leading it for almost two years. It helps those in grief to work through some things, and to realize that they aren't losing their minds. Grief is a funny thing. Just when you think you're doing OK, it will rear it's head and make you realize that you may not be so OK. The holidays are so hard to get through, from Thanksgiving to New Years and of course Christmas in between. Every year that passes since Liz's death seems to be a slight bit easier than the last year, but something always seems to spark the tears and this year is no different. It doesn't seem to be anything in particular that sparks it, it just happens. I guess maybe the fact that I have so many friends that are experiencing grief for another time, makes me think about loss.

I have been so diligently trying to do special things this year for Christmas. I have been making things, and baking things, sewing things and stamping things. I love to be creative. However, I am finding that I am not getting a lot of my projects finished. That too is how I am feeling about my life. I have begun so many things during the past several years with great enthusiasm, only to get distracted and not complete what I had begun.
I am hoping that in 2008 God will help me to finish the things that I have begun and then forgotten. I am praying that 2008 will be my "year of completion".

I truly desire to be used by God, but I tend to allow distractions to cloud my desire to serve Him. I feel that way every year, but I think that over the past five months of being "un-employed" I have been able to get over some barriers that seemed like mountain ranges in my life. Oh, I still have a few more mountains to climb, and hills to make my way over too, but I pray that my journey will be met with encouragement from friends, and family. That I would be pleasing to my heavenly Father and be able to be an obedient child of God.

I don't know if I'll have time to blog again before Christmas, but if I don't I want to wish all of you a Merry Christmas (particularly some of my far away friends that I don't get to see) but may each and everyone of you have a blessed time of rejoicing and celebrating. Remember, we may celebrate a Birthday, but it's not only the life of Jesus we celebrate, but the life He brings to each of us if we believe!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Brrrrrr.

Baby it's cold outside! Icy, slushy, window scraping cold. I'm so glad the boys came home yesterday in the lovely sunshine. Finals are over, first semester under their belts, and five loads of laundry later. I'm a happy momma. It's so hard to believe how fast the time goes.

I am preparing for tomorrow's employee Christmas party for our business. Getting out the "pretty dishes" ironing the tablecloths, washing the winter scene stemware by hand. I'm excited and anxious to start cooking. Beef tenderloin, parsley and buttered new potatoes, steamed broccoli, creamed corn from our garden, salad, rolls...ummmm and appetizers and dessert too. Makes me hungry to think about it!

I still have some shopping to do for Christmas, and a few more things to wrap. I have most of my groceries for Christmas too. I got all of my candy made yesterday, I still have some baking to do, but at least I got my oven cleaned on Monday! Now I can bake without my kitchen getting smoky!

It seems that God is still doing some inner work for me before I am able to finish writing my manuscript. It's really hard to get past some of the hang-ups I've been holding on to most of my life. I think that the getting organized thing that I've felt I needed to do was not only to get my house cleaned, but it is for my heart and mind as well. Please keep me in your prayers as I under-go this whole adventure. I want so badly to complete the task the God set before me, but it seems that I have allowed my insecurities to rule my life. God is showing me on an almost daily basis things that I have allowed to come between He and I. There are times that I simply want to turn tail and run, but God gently coaxes me into listening to what He has to say. I'm finding that I don't like to hear the things that He has to point out that I need to release to Him. It hurts. I'm slowly working on trusting that it really won't kill me, even though it may feel like it.

You know that when God speaks something to your heart, sometimes it's fearful to think that He is going to bring some of those things to pass. You can feel so inadequate, and incapable. The dreams and visions that God has reminded me of that I have had over the past 25 years, are beginning to take form. What seemed like an impossibility way back then, sometimes still seems like an impossibility today, yet it's happening. God has been doing the "remember when" thing in the past few months. Things that I had completely forgotten about or deemed just a dream I had, are actually real. I guess God had to give me a "warning" all those years ago just so It wouldn't give me apoplexy today. God is SOOOO amazing. I know He is equipping me to face each day no matter how I feel about a situation.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Just a pile of thoughts.

My #2 son, Jordan, sent me this the other day. Click on the link to watch it. http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1171055534 appearing in the following order :Chris, Micah, Jordan and Buzz. I laughed pretty hard. I guess at least one of my family is in the Christmas mood. Although Jordan has been listening to Christmas music since September, and decorated his dorm room too. Maybe there is a little bit of me in him after all.

The college son's are having finals, two for Jordan today and one for Chris, then two more for Jordan tomorrow, and one for Chris,. Wednesday only one for each of them. It's hard to believe that school is half way over for them. I don't like to admit it, but I am getting used to doing laundry for only two of us! It more than doubles when they're home. Last night at our Small group we had a small gathering, but we did have fun. We went to Denise's house. We had lots of yummy Christmassy goodies, and played the game "Apples to Apples" I had never played it before. It was fun! Even Jeff liked it and he isn't a "gamey" kind of guy. He even suggested that we play games this Friday night for our company party. Huh, wonders never cease.

Right now I wish I was two people. I have so much that I want to do, but there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. I still haven't finished my projects from last week. I intend to get them done then take pictures... HONEST! I do have a clean closet and drawers now. Yes, not that I intended to do that, but we needed to snake out the bathtub drain and naturally the access is in MY closet! Ugh. But hey, it looks really nice now. I only need to get rid of the pile of summer clothes in front of my dresser.
I wish I was able to make all of the things I'd like to make for all the people in my "circle of friends and loved ones". I have enough stuff in my basement that I could make gifts all year for next year and still have stuff down there for the following year.

I had a pretty cool experience on my way to church yesterday. I was half thinking half praying, and I felt the Lord urge me to seek out a couple of people. Apparently it really was a God thing because the one person was standing right outside the door of the "Sanctanasium" (Sanctuary-Gymnasium). I took that from the Lord as "I told you so". I also saw one person that was on my heart that doesn't even attend our church. That's
cool!
John had a terrific message. (www.newpointe.org). Maybe God was speaking to a lot of people yesterday. Listen to the message and you'll see what I mean.

Well, I've covered enough topics to make every one's head spin, so I think I'll go watch Seinfeld with Jeff!

Friday, December 7, 2007

Weeellll, it's been awhile

I really have worked on a blog or two since I last posted, but decided that those words were meant just for me, so I didn't post! Sorry. But I'm back for now...
I have been soooooo busy in the last month. I have been making Christmas gifts. Yes, all the bragging about what I wanted to do to prepare for Christmas, well, I have actually been doing a lot of them. I have busily been cutting and piecing quilted items. It has been so fun! I have not quilted or even pieced a quilt for a few years, and I forgot how much fun it is. It is very time consuming, but I am taking a short cut by machine quilting the pieces. So any of you that get one of my "creations" remember that I am a little rusty. Some of the pieces are not exactly perfect, but they are stitched with love! As soon as I finish a couple of them I'll take a picture and post it. I have begun to do some baking, and will do more this week in preparation for our Christmas party for our employees next Friday. I am doing the cooking for it, so I am planning the menu and the decorating for that evening, as well as doing the quilting. I have also wrapped the gifts that I have so far. I feel slightly ahead of where I normally am at this point.

I love Christmas! I'm probably worse than a kid. I have done all the decorating myself. I had my boys and my husband haul out the decorations down from the barn loft the day after Thanksgiving. That is the end of their help, except for Jeff, he did put his ONE favorite ornament on the tree.
See the picture of it ------------->

Jeff's grandparents had this, and after Mamie Jane died in 1982, we were able to get some old ornaments this has a little spinner that moves from the heat of a light it's pretty cool. Anyway that is my husbands handy work! I am a kook when it comes to decorating. I still have some decorations to put up outside. Maybe I'll get to it tomorrow.
It's been snowy the past three days, so it's really putting me in the mood for Christmas. I know I'm a little obsessed. Just pray for me!
Two of the boys will be coming home this week. Jordan and Chris have finals Monday thru Wednesday, then will come home after their last final on Wednesday morning. WOO-HOO! Micah will be coming home LATE on Christmas eve. His last service will be over around 10 p.m. and then he'll hit the road! I can't wait!

I've been a little under the weather today, feeling kinda "pukey". I was supposed to spend the afternoon with my sister. We were going to make to-from cards for our gifts. This is a big endeavor for my sister. She is not real active in the craft department, but she ordered a set of Christmas stamps when I had my Stampin' Up party. Anyway, I had to cancel at the last minute (bummer) so' we'll try to do it another day. My nephew Sean will be coming home from Costa Rica this Thursday. He has been there since the end of August going to school. He is a student at Mount Vernon, and was doing a semester of study down there. He is a Spanish major as well as a Youth Pastor major.
I better run... things to do, crafts to make... decorations to decorate...
Ahhhh, it's good to be back!