Saturday, December 22, 2007

What a week

It's so amazing to me what God can do in my life in a weeks time. He has spoken in several different ways that I won't go into, but I am encouraged.
I know that there are things that need A LOT of attention and things that need changed in my life, but there are also things that God is using. I am always stunned when that happens.

I had opportunities this week that I am sure God used to teach me a few things about myself. Even if we are totally human, and make mistakes, if we make ourselves available to be used by Him, He will actually use us. I have been very blessed to be a part of a support group that our church holds for those in grief. It is called GriefShare. Jeff and I have been leading it for almost two years. It helps those in grief to work through some things, and to realize that they aren't losing their minds. Grief is a funny thing. Just when you think you're doing OK, it will rear it's head and make you realize that you may not be so OK. The holidays are so hard to get through, from Thanksgiving to New Years and of course Christmas in between. Every year that passes since Liz's death seems to be a slight bit easier than the last year, but something always seems to spark the tears and this year is no different. It doesn't seem to be anything in particular that sparks it, it just happens. I guess maybe the fact that I have so many friends that are experiencing grief for another time, makes me think about loss.

I have been so diligently trying to do special things this year for Christmas. I have been making things, and baking things, sewing things and stamping things. I love to be creative. However, I am finding that I am not getting a lot of my projects finished. That too is how I am feeling about my life. I have begun so many things during the past several years with great enthusiasm, only to get distracted and not complete what I had begun.
I am hoping that in 2008 God will help me to finish the things that I have begun and then forgotten. I am praying that 2008 will be my "year of completion".

I truly desire to be used by God, but I tend to allow distractions to cloud my desire to serve Him. I feel that way every year, but I think that over the past five months of being "un-employed" I have been able to get over some barriers that seemed like mountain ranges in my life. Oh, I still have a few more mountains to climb, and hills to make my way over too, but I pray that my journey will be met with encouragement from friends, and family. That I would be pleasing to my heavenly Father and be able to be an obedient child of God.

I don't know if I'll have time to blog again before Christmas, but if I don't I want to wish all of you a Merry Christmas (particularly some of my far away friends that I don't get to see) but may each and everyone of you have a blessed time of rejoicing and celebrating. Remember, we may celebrate a Birthday, but it's not only the life of Jesus we celebrate, but the life He brings to each of us if we believe!


Sue K. said...

I love your honesty! God knew in his wisdom that you would be able to share your pain. I don't think I could do that. I pray every year life gets easier in the sad moments and the happy memories excel beyond those sad moments. You are a beautiful lady, and God is blessing you in all you do for others>

Jane said...
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Jane said...

As difficult as it was to lose your daughter, I am once again reminded that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him, to those who are called according to His purpose. People want to know that someone else has literally "walked in their shoes." He will continue to use you, Becki, because you love Him and have a willing heart. And you will cry with people and feel their pain because you have walked where they are walking and healing will happen and God will be glorified.