Baby it's cold outside! Icy, slushy, window scraping cold. I'm so glad the boys came home yesterday in the lovely sunshine. Finals are over, first semester under their belts, and five loads of laundry later. I'm a happy momma. It's so hard to believe how fast the time goes.
I am preparing for tomorrow's employee Christmas party for our business. Getting out the "pretty dishes" ironing the tablecloths, washing the winter scene stemware by hand. I'm excited and anxious to start cooking. Beef tenderloin, parsley and buttered new potatoes, steamed broccoli, creamed corn from our garden, salad, rolls...ummmm and appetizers and dessert too. Makes me hungry to think about it!
I still have some shopping to do for Christmas, and a few more things to wrap. I have most of my groceries for Christmas too. I got all of my candy made yesterday, I still have some baking to do, but at least I got my oven cleaned on Monday! Now I can bake without my kitchen getting smoky!
It seems that God is still doing some inner work for me before I am able to finish writing my manuscript. It's really hard to get past some of the hang-ups I've been holding on to most of my life. I think that the getting organized thing that I've felt I needed to do was not only to get my house cleaned, but it is for my heart and mind as well. Please keep me in your prayers as I under-go this whole adventure. I want so badly to complete the task the God set before me, but it seems that I have allowed my insecurities to rule my life. God is showing me on an almost daily basis things that I have allowed to come between He and I. There are times that I simply want to turn tail and run, but God gently coaxes me into listening to what He has to say. I'm finding that I don't like to hear the things that He has to point out that I need to release to Him. It hurts. I'm slowly working on trusting that it really won't kill me, even though it may feel like it.
You know that when God speaks something to your heart, sometimes it's fearful to think that He is going to bring some of those things to pass. You can feel so inadequate, and incapable. The dreams and visions that God has reminded me of that I have had over the past 25 years, are beginning to take form. What seemed like an impossibility way back then, sometimes still seems like an impossibility today, yet it's happening. God has been doing the "remember when" thing in the past few months. Things that I had completely forgotten about or deemed just a dream I had, are actually real. I guess God had to give me a "warning" all those years ago just so It wouldn't give me apoplexy today. God is SOOOO amazing. I know He is equipping me to face each day no matter how I feel about a situation.