Tuesday, August 2, 2011

My heart

I have come to the place in my life that I simply do not know where to go next. The thoughts of wondering if I should quit, ring quite loud in my head. Lifting these issues to the Lord in prayer. Then waiting. I can tell you that after all of the years since I began writing my story, I still believe that I am being obedient to what God put on my heart way back in July of 2000.

Eleven years after the task was set before me, I once again asked God if I should simply stop writing since it appears I am not getting as far as I hoped I would. I was sitting with my accountability friend and was discussing this possibility of quitting. We were sitting at my dining room table deep in conversation. Suddenly my phone rings. I feel some disdain at being interrupted. I look at the caller ID and it appears that it is a “sales” type call so I do not answer and let it go to voicemail.

A moment later a voice comes on and leaves a message. The message the man left was that he and his wife were reading a devotional that I wrote several years ago. It was actually the very first thing that I wrote and sold! (To be honest, it is the only thing that I have made money on. Everything else that I have written has been given to a particular ministry, and has had no monetary benefits.) Anyway, he went on to say that what I had written was very good, and that it spoke to he and his wife. He left his name, and address along with the words encouraging me to continue writing!

If I ever questioned whether God still speaks in an audible voice, I now know He does!

As Christians we often question God about our lives, for direction, for answers to prayers that we have prayed and so on. I am among those. I do believe that we all want to do things that will be right, that will bring Glory to God in some way. We don’t enjoy making mistakes, at least I don’t! I want things to be right, and correct. I hate making mistakes, and find it hugely embarrassing. Yet, I know that while I still have breath in my body, I will make mistakes.

I have written before that I worry about disappointing God. I am sure that I have out of both innocence and guilt. I will on occasion do something that I want to do without considering whether it is a good thing or not. I imagine that if you are reading this, you are probably among the majority as I am. If you are among the minority, I ask that you pray for me.

My point? To show you and myself that God is always listening, always working to prepare us for the task that He has set before us. He will equip us to do what He asks us to do. Yep, He will and He does!

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